I was thinking just now of going the whole 9 yards and actually counting how many subs/slaves/wannabes/girls/women/friends etc I talk to and posting it here.


off the top of my head...
I know there are many names...

and truthfully only a few are truly important to me...

those are the ones that have understood me best...
through this whole hard process...

those are the ones that understand I am in love with my wife.
my former slave... my spirit girl - now dead.

those that understand me...understand

I am a good man with a broken heart...
emotionally available? sometimes...
hurting always....

wanting to be cynical and hateful...


those that are special
are the ones not letting me forget,
that there is more to a woman than hurting a Man's feelings
remind me that some women value things differently than others...

remind me to ask for what I want...
and hope I get it...
even it is not what she would have wanted.



I am married guy who will always love and hate his soon to be ex-wife.
I will be a part time dad to my 3 full time sons... and that will break me.
the ones that are special here on line and in real life
are the ones that want to see me survive...
and they do what they can to make that happen.


frankly it is too much to ask any one girl...
it is too much to ask
and it is my burden anyway....

I just want to be held and respected and loved.
maybe I get what I want...
maybe I don't...

we shall see.



"No where you can be that isn't where you're meant to be... it's easy! All you need is LOVE!"