Saturday, October 22, 2005

THIS MUST STOP!

where to begin?

I'm angry, I'm hurt...
girls think that ONLY they get hurt when they get raped...

but I told her, everyone that cares about you gets hurt and wants to stop this...

WHAT am I to say?

I feel like I've been no help at all...

snail was raped again by her father last night


nothing I say or do matters....
she has to live her own life...
its very frustrating...
but is that because I've made her so important to me...
as a way to avoid and deflect how venita hurts me daily?


if I thought it would work
I would tell her
I can't take being raped by your dad any more...
talk to me the day you leave that house for good.

but I can't do that either....
its so hard to let this keep happenning !

THIS MUST STOP!!!
what am I going to do?

how can this just keep happenning ???

my heart is broken



"how your soul learns... blessed and burned in the fire of your life!"

Monday, October 17, 2005

to display her submissiveness naturally

SirwLove: you are a very quiet one....

zip422000: ?? though Sir - tell me what the contol does for you

SirwLove: for me its all about control
I want obedience and devotion

SirwLove: my favorite words are "yes Sir" and "anything for you Sir"

SirwLove: it thrills me to see a girl submit

SirwLove: surrender

SirwLove: do as she is told

SirwLove: and frankly there is no 1 particular thing I really like... fetish wise... I just like the notion of YOU or any slave/sub surrendering and going past where she thought she could go

SirwLove: if she makes some progress that is fine with me

SirwLove: not sure if that made sense

SirwLove: where as SOME slaves might need pain or another might need humiliation or another might just need a lot less of both but some taste of each...

SirwLove: I just like knowing she went past her boundaries for ME




SirwLove: whatever the boundry isSirwLove: I want her to display her submissiveness naturally... I don't really enjoy bratt behavior


SirwLove: I want her to care alot about pleasing her Master

SirwLove: was that an answer?*chuckles

zip422000: hell of an answer -makes snse -i like the thought of someone getting into my head enough to make me want to do it -

SirwLove: when you saw the word "bitch" come across the scene what was your first reaction
zip422000: I liked it - got wet - bratty behavior - u always want total submission? nothing else?

SirwLove: bratty behavior on line... I can do very little about ...except to leave... in person I can do something about it and that can be fun occasionally

SirwLove: there is something very sexy about a bratt that's been tamed into submission

SirwLove: however...


SirwLove: sometimes the brattiness can be the thing that makes a girl charming and interesting

SirwLove: she better be DAMN clever and damn cute to pull it off tho

SirwLove: because it will make me mad too

SirwLove: so total submission ...total surrender is my goal - if only for a few minutes or an hour

zip422000: like it

SirwLove: good bitch ...SirwLove: .*pets your head*zip422000: lol -thank you Sir



"how your soul learns... blessed and burned in the fire of your life!"

as great as you are ...you're not for the faint of heart, Sir


Marlee says:Well! Good morning to You, HE-MAN ... i love that pic i love it How are You this morning?
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: lets see was supposed to be on a plane to my mother in laws funeral flight was cancelled ..missed funeral now staying home for the next 4 days alone
Marlee says: oh my, was that the funeral You spoke of?
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: and I have 2 days of work off
Marlee says: hey, i'd give an arm for 4 days alone, lol
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: interesting
Marlee says: what is interesting
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: my next few days it has not really sunk in yet
Marlee says: ahhh, that You're alone or Your loss?
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: its a long story um that I'm not going I guess
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: that will be nice I think alone time with 4 cats and 2 birds by the way
Marlee says: what kind of birds?
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: austrailian ring neck parakeet... he's like a small parrot and a white dove
Marlee says: ahhh, my father had a lorakeet(sp), which is sort of like a South American parakeet, but is also a small parrot, i believe
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: his name is Ricky.... he talks some he likes to say "lil rick lil rick lil rick... loves loves loves you"
Marlee says: lmao, that's cute; i'm glad he's at YOUR house though, that might annoy me, lol
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yes he will annoy you peep peep pearl pearl peep pearl hello pearl PEEP Pearl is the dove she hoots OMG constantly
Marlee says: how lovely for YOU
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: unbelievable she is 13 yrs old I have no idea how long doves live but I am impressed she's not smart but she's tough
Marlee says: i am not sure either, i know my father's bird had a life expectancy of 40 yrs, but she got ill when he had to board her while he was out of town and she died
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yeah they are very sensitive
Marlee says: yes, i must say though, i don't miss the bird poop, he didn't keep her in a cage
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yes Ricky used to be free to fly around I know what you mean
Marlee says: what moved You to keep them in a cage after being ''free roam chickens'' so to speak
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: having kids / babies in the house and then the cats went from 2 to 5 then 6 cats...now back to 4
Marlee says: Where do You live? Mutual of Omaha
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: wild kingdom yes do you watch The Simpsons
Marlee says: Off and on, i love Matt Groening, and have been following him for years (his Life Is Hell and Work is Hell are ) let me see if i actually answered the question lol
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yes he is great
Marlee says: i'm not unfamiliar with The Simpsons
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: okay on the Simpsons there is a character an old woman that has tons of cats she doesn't really speak just mumbles and shouts and throws a cat at you
Marlee says: *ACHOO!!*
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: that would be my estranged wife
Marlee says: LMAO i was going to say is that what YOU do, but no, i see she does is she a thrower by nature, or the cats love tossing?
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: its either funny or sad depending on how you look at it
Marlee says: in the moment, i imagine sad & scarey, in the retelling, comical
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: ah yes a woody allen principle of comedy
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: tradegy + time = comedy
Marlee says: lmao, You know i hate that i refuse to watch any more of his work because he is brilliant
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yeah he's a freak apparently but once upon a time he made some comedy as well
Marlee says: well, i know that my personal boycott in the grand scheme of things is nill, but it makes me feel better not to support his work; i feel the same about polanski
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: and michael jackson who can listen to the song ... a great dance song btw... Pretty Young Thing from Thriller with out getting the willies
Marlee says: yes, him too; i remember the excitement(sp) when thriller premiered, i had a party for crying out loud it's like i guess it makes me feel like an activist, lol i won't buy domino's pizza either
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: I won't buy them pizza they have enough already
Marlee says: lol
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: get this... you are a new friend okay?
Marlee says: ok
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: a new friend here on messenger.. very cool ... glad to be getting to know you now... I've been on line for 6 yrs maybe 5.5 but about that and the first friend I ever made in an msn chatroom is still my friend today we've never met...but we are good friends
Marlee says: i understand, i have quite a few of those as well
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: and we talk a little bit every day I have many friends on here and yahoo but amanda has been there the longest... many MANY have come and gone... any way I say all this to show something she told me earlier ...I think it may be a new motto for me it made me laugh and think all at once --- And lets face it Sir as great as You are....You're not for the faint of heart
Marlee says: LMAO ... that's a good one, now You have an obligation to tell me what she meant
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: As great as I am... I'm not for the faint of heart ...omg perfect and painful and just lovely it will take a while to get to know me sometimes I simply refer to myself as damaged goods I rrrrrrrrreally do try to be a good guy tho
Marlee says: well, You know ... with proper care one can get a LOT of wear out of a retread i refer to myself as an iceberg, what is seen is only about 10% of what is really there
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yeah... you're a lady who's been getting nothing but dirty breaks well we can clean and tighten your brakes but you'll have to stay in the garage all night
Marlee says: lmao .... works for me Groucho Marx: ''Those are my p rinciples, but if you don't like those I have some others!'' ugh ... ^principles
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: I would join any club that would have someone like ME as a member wouldn't grrrr bad typist and on and on the point being YOU know who is/was
Marlee says: yes i am a grown up (by my personal definition that means i'm *groan* over 40)
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: I can see you in the kitchen bending over a hot stove... but I can't see the stove
Marlee says: lol
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: I turn 47 in November that's unbelievable
Marlee says: i'm 9 months Your senior
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: bueno seniorita seniora? yo no se
Marlee says: i have an 100 year old spirit and a 23 year old's heart, so 47 works
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: nods old soul and baby face here
Marlee says: i used to be seniora, but do you get to go back to seniorita again, lol, cuz if so ... deal me in
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: And lets face it Sir as great as You are....You're not for the faint of heart its my new motto have you heard? And lets face it Sir as great as You are....You're not for the faint of heart must be just me...
Marlee says: lmao
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: SHE would know she knows all about me and still said I was great and yet I get a disclaimer I love it perfect handle with care And lets face it Sir as great as You are....You're not for the faint of heart
Marlee says: i think it's wonderful, but i believe totally in agape love which is to say, if you love someone, you love them BECAUSE of their faults, not IN SPITE of them without reservation or complication or i can't call the word
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: we are our sins
Marlee says: proving anything is the meaning
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: by definition?
Marlee says: well, i don't believe in faith by works; it's a similar kind of thing you have to just love someone, for every thing they are
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yes and sooooooo what defines each of us what makes us special or different is our sins... or ???
Marlee says: hmmm
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: never thought of that before hmmmmm just thinking out loud
Marlee says: i think if you consider life as a piece of say, fabric
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: love someone faults and all
Marlee says: there will be some threads missing or some small tears
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yes...of course or its not loving the person its loving "behaviors"
Marlee says: well we can love someone and NOT love what they do i say that to my boys a lot I love you, but right now, i'm NOT liking this or that
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: yes agreed... and I think the opposite is true too... and its how ppl get mixed up in bad relationships you love a behavior someone displays and its not all they are and then you are dissappointed and disillusioned or rather not YOU but ya... anyone I think it might be easy to associate a certain behavior coming from someone you were attracted to in the first place.... chemically... and think that was lasting love
Marlee says: yes, i agree. very well said
▫§ìřwith£övê▫ says: never ever thought of things quite that way before... right now it seems obvious the truth must be in between
Marlee says: lmao ... too true, sometimes we have to search for the truth, but odd how a lie will slap us in the face
Marlee~~~>>>Marley/Mayfield... One Love
Written By Bob Marley, Curtis Mayfield
Lyrics:
One love, one heartLet's get together and feel all rightHear the children crying (One love)Hear the children crying (One heart)Sayin', "Give thanks and praise to the Lord and I will feel all right."Sayin', "Let's get together and feel all right."Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoaLet them all pass all their dirty remarks (One love)There is one question I'd really love to ask (One heart)Is there a place for the hopeless sinnerWho has hurt all mankind just to save his own?Believe meOne love, one heartLet's get together and feel all rightAs it was in the beginning (One love)So shall it be in the end (One heart)Alright, "Give thanks and praise to the Lord and I will feel all right.""Let's get together and feel all right."One more thingLet's get together to fight this Holy Armageddon (One love)So when the Man comes there will be no, no doom (One song)Have pity on those whose chances grow thinnerThere ain't no hiding place from the Father of CreationSayin', "One love, one heartLet's get together and feel all right."I'm pleading to mankind (One love)Oh, Lord (One heart) Whoa."Give thanks and praise to the Lord and I will feel all right."Let's get together and feel all right.(Repeat)




"how your soul learns... blessed and burned in the fire of your life!"